Emma: What d’you call it when it’s like that?
Alfie: Nothing. I haven’t really thought about it. Well, not to give it a name.
Emma: It must have a name, though.
Alfie: How about Mr Droopy?
Emma: Don’t be daft. I mean a proper name.
Alfie: Percy? John Thomas?
Emma: Be serious. What would the doctor call it?
Alfie: How the hell should I know? Maybe he doesn’t give his cock a name. Not many people do.
Emma: Oh, you’re hopeless. Look. It’s not erect, is it? So what is it?
Alfie: [The penny drops at last] Oh, I see. It’s flaccid. That’s the word, Flaccid.
Emma: “Flaccid.” I love it when it’s “flaccid”. It feels lovely and soft in my mouth. Mmmmm…
[Enter Mr Stiffy]
